Ho Ho Yo

Do I look like I have any Christmas stress................................

A poem for my Mommy

The author of this poem is anon....anan....um......unknown but it is what I duz fink of my mummy.......



I lie belly up in the sunshine, happier than you will ever be,

Today I sniffed many dog butts, and then celebrate by kissing your face,

I sound the alarm ! Paperboy - come to kill us all ! Look, Look, LOOK !!

I sound the alarm ! Garbage man - come to kill us all ! Look, Look, LOOK !!!

I lift my leg and whiz on each bush. Hello Spot, sniff this and weep.

I hate my choke chain - Look, world, they strangle me ! Ack Ack Ack

Sleeping here, my chin on your foot - no greater bliss - well, Maybe catching cats.

Look in my eyes and deny it. No human could love you as much as I do.

Anonymous

Poorly Mummy

Well I am sorry for the delay in ''blogging'' but my Mummy was taken werry poorly and did ave to go ''opital'' which meant I stayed wiv Mum's fwiend an it was a mini holiday for me as she luvs me but we was apart for like 5 days and I did miss her werry werry much but I did texted her each day to let her know how much I weally do wurve her. Oh my goodness when she did come to get me it was such a surprise I wan around and around until I did feel werry dizzy.............Mummy did smelly real funny like lot's of oldie people so she had a long shower when she got home and then she did smell like my Mum. On the first day back with her I wouldnt leave her side and Mum says I am still sticking to her like glue but dat is cuz I am never ever EVER letting her go again. So there !!! In the picture you can see what did happen when silly Mum tried to read a magazine instead of giving me her full attention, she weally is a silly billy ! Laters.com and we welcome everyone back. xxxxxxxx

Pawfection

Cosmo would like to point out that he does lub his Tobe's werry werry much as you can see......in the pic I was teaching Tobe's how to be a dawg.........

We have both been werry lucky and found our forever homes and parents and being the same bweed we will always lub one another but also play and teasy somatimes.................... But we both dink each over is pwetty Pawfect.

Toby is in my posse and will always remain there and when I do see im one day I will kiss im a ickle bit but I is not a gay dog but ''Cosima'' my feminine side does come out now and den.

Goodnight and wemember ............................it's Cosmolitious.com

England V France

So the following convo took place between my French ''brother'' now bear in mind I taught him all he knows Toby is aware I say who, I say why and I say when and he is getting a bit too big for his paws, the picture on the right speaks for itself.

My Darling Mummy instigated by advising her Maman that her's (Me) was better ......i.e that I ''AM'' the cutest ickle Yorky and I am sent from the angels from up above, the following is a transcript .......

Toby : I don't fink so Cos, I am more knatrel...ha..ha...woof...woof...my dad left me to cut some grass and eye wuz very un appy

Cosmo : Is your papa back yet Gizmo (a loving nickname given by my doglet to their doglet)......a caring question we thought.......

Toby: Yes ee iz ? I is werry appy to see im, after wot you sed about me, leest he luvs me

Cosmo: He may luv u but what is ''natural'' about somefink that resembles an Eewok mixed with a gremlin ? ha ha ha

Toby : Mamam saiz if u is gonna keep dissing me, eye isnt to talk 2 u know more, I is sadded...I did not fink I woz that uglee.....(obviously Toby's parents do not allow mirrors in the house as you can see by the photographic evidence posted at the beginning of this blog and for those of a nervous disposition we do apologise)

Cosmo: Well now I duz likey u a bit allwight ? I is gonna giv ya a nicker name.....was finking Giz....Cuz u is always like kinda woofing to me.....Giz us one of yor tops Cos & Giz a ''puppy purse'' Cos.....innit dough ? Ow bowt Gizmolitious ? Duz u liket dat ????

Toby : I fink u is bein saar, sarkas, duh, orrible to mee and I dunno y cuz I dont arm anee bodee. in fact I is sleeping most of duh time cos i fink i is deepressed bout the fings u iz saying

END OF TRANSCRIPT as the conversation is now being assessed for legal purposes.

It's FAIRLY obvious Toby is doing his Mr Innocent, let's face what can he do with the get up he was posted wearing on facebook today I mean I ask you.......anyway my adoring fan's you all ''KNOW'' what you must do................go battle forth in my name and shout from the rooftops.......WE WANT COSMO, WE WANT COSMO

It's the weekend.............................innit.com

Well, it had to happen.................I did have my first fight/scrap call it what you will and it was ''kinda'' my fault.

I went round to my fwiends house and Harvey (part of my posse) was there and he was playing with his too quite happily but once or twice got a bit too close for my liking so I told him off....then mummy told me off..........so then I told Harvey off again and he did give me a big telling off, with big teeth but silly Mummy didn't know as it was all very quick so Mum tried to put me in the ''submissive'' pose aka Cesar Milan and I didn't half yelp cause it hurt !!! it was only when Mummy put me on her lap that she saw the blood and then she felt werry, werry bad.... So............................(big sigh) she cleaned and bathed it with tcp and water and I was werry bwave and did get some ham when she was doing it so I didn't cwy but my Mummy nearly did as it is da first bite I did get.

Afterwards Harvey looked werry sorry but I would not look at him at all and Mummy thinks it is cuz I was scareded but nope it's cuz I am seriously debating about evicting Harv from my posse cuz you don't bite the paw that pat's you ..............I mean duz ya ? Sooooooo I am taking it all under advicement and we will probably go to ballot but I can be bought with a couple of ''sausages'' so we shall see...................I am recovering and Mum is mixing TLC with TCP ....oh my does it does stink though !!!

As you can see in the photo Mum is having to type today on my behalf.....she is doing ok and I am still werry tired and twaumatized but I will be back to my Cosmolitious self real soon guys...............Please send flowers/chocolates/bones to my fan club ok ? I thank you.

Happy Happy

Well I had a very lovely afternoon and played with bestest fwiend in the whole world Lola (that is bestest doggy fwiend as Mummy is by bestest bestest fwiend).............Mum did us a kong each and we enjoyed them and then we played and were werry appy like you an see in the foto........

I then got to thinking about walking and I came up wiv this.........

Walking

There is a misconception that your human will take you for a walk. This suggests that they will lead you. Wrong. The lead is affixed to you, therefore the responsibility lies with you in the direction of travel. Go where you want; your human will follow. If they try to restrain you, make some loud gagging and coughing noises when other people are around. Your human will fear that someone may report them for cruelty, and will therfore ease off the restraining. Always use this point in time to run faster.

Doggy Parlour

Soooooooooooooo, it's fairly apparent Mum is taking Lola & yours truly to the grooming parlour today....................we both got wind of it earlier when she didn't spent nearly as much time brushing my hair...........Mum is convinced she wants the ''bob'' look for me.............similar to the doglet in SATC2 who is actually quite a cool dude and kinda in my posse as you need a few celebs now and then to raise your game...........in the movie he is called ''baby'' but in real life he is called Gidget (I like it) Gormley (not so much) and is quite a veteran but looks kinda my age but is in fact 15 years old so really he is pushing a 100 so fair play to the chap as he is still in the movies and not suffering any ageism that the ''ladies'' seem to go through.

Anyhow.....if I am happy with my cut I will duly post pictures..........if it all goes quiet then you know I am throwing my bones out of my pram.

later girls & guys xx

It's gonna be...................a lovely day............

Well we all had a very lovely day yesterday..............in the morning I allowed Mum and Dad to bring Lola and Raider down to the river with Mum, Dad and moi for a lovely walk and the brekkie, it was luvverly and I looked tooooo cute and received a ton of pets and oooohhhs and aaaagghhhsss, so did the other doglets but I am sure I got the most................suppose I will let them have some pic's up (just to fill up the blog don't you see).

We then went home and had a rest before Mum decided we would go exploring so Dad drove to a town called Totnes which Mum said was ''only'' 37 minutes away from us.....................I was sure there was another lady in the car as I kept on hearing a voice bossing Dad on where to drive and when to turn left, I couldnt find her and she is even bossier than mum !!! tee hee.

Totnes is very pretty and has lot's of smelly fishes that my Mum loves but luckily she had a ''gourmet burger'' for lunch (mum has meat when she is due her b12 jab which means I get treats !!!)................I did help her a bit with it but only cuz it was 100% pure steak (that is what the menu did say)................it was rather scrumdiddly and a welcome hold filler as I didn't eat my breakfast and Mum doesn't let me mess around any more so after a long time............about 10 minutes but to us doggies it's over an hour she does pick the bowl up and put the food in the bin which I think is very cheeky but I suppose I must learn.

Anyway......back to Totnes which is full of werry werry steap hills so I was rather glad I was being carried in my puppy purse even though Mum says I look like a ''european wrestler wearing a leotard'' (whatever that is or means !!!), lot's of people stopped and stared, some laughed, some stroked me and I am getting much better at allowing people to touch me as I think it helps them when they touch a cutey pie like me, Mum says it can be furapootic or something like that so I normally let them.

Near the end of the day we stopped at a pwetty cafe for coffee (I just had water) and cuz it was still sunny Mum let me wear her hat for a while so I came over all funny woofing.....shambong and Billy Jean................................innit though.

Hurrah at the Vets

Well, I will admit it and tell you I do NOT like the man in the white coat but today I did hear him say he doesn't need to see me for 1 month and I know that is a lot of sleepies (of course the vet would quite like to see my every day as I am fairly sure I am his fave but I like staying away)............Mum is very happy with my poorly leg, I only lift it sometimes and that is what Mum call's a ''habit''............I think it's a bit like when she buys handbags/shoes & clothes !!!

So good news all round and I can hop to it !!! ha ha. At the vets there was a baby version of me so Mum got all broody but I am confident I am still her No 1 boy, sent from up above....made by the Angels to shower Mum with love.............aaaaaaaaaaaaaggggggggghhhhhhh.

Anyhow, onwards & upwards and I will leave you this gem for today.............................

Remember, the sooner your human wakes up, the sooner you can take them for a walk.Humans particularly enjoy getting up extra early at the weekends so that they can make the most of their days off work..............I aim for around 6am............try it.com

Come on Mum.......................

Sooooooooooooo, I have told Mum she really has to get the hang of these blogs........I put all the pawwork in and then end up nagging Mum to update so I do apologise for this weeks new post.

Well what to say, the weather has been playing tricks....first it's sunny and we can go for lovely river walks such as the one above and then the next minute the heavens open up and I just have to thank my lucky stars that Mum packed my raincoat for me !!!! I mean......how wet ?

I know I lucky to have a Mummy that will take me out come rain or come shine and I wuv her werry werry much.

So this is a short update but Mum now has all log-on's on passwords firmly imprinted in her mind so following on from the words of a certain song...............................

Things can only get better !!!

Kissing cousins ???

When I first moved to this green, green land I came across a white fur-baby called Lola......see picture attached...........so yes she is kinda cute.....Mum calls her the "Ickle Clown", Aunty Sara calls here Lola Bola and/or Lola Manilow Paleschi............Yawn.com, anyway here we are getting ready for Christmas caroles and boy were we good.......we did Silent Yowl and Merry Whiskerless, it all went down yowly well.

The funny thing under the tree is Camden, one of the those stoooooopid cats, she looks tiny & cute but boy does she pack a mean swipe and her claws just shoot out from the settee, the bed and behind doors so you really have to be on your guard.

So around Xmas this little fur baby called Raider came for a ''visit'' (that's what Mummy told me) and decided he quite liked it and would stay !!!

RrrrrrrrRaider............zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz....oh...do excuse me but I do fall asleep so easily when I just know his puppy pic IS going to be gushed at so I will breathe in with love and out with a growl..... Nope !!!....it's not working......no can do.....I may make room in another post for him.........or I may not.

Anyway when he came to stay he was ever so young, I think Mummy said about 12 weeks so we were all meant to love him and take care of him but I wasn't having any of it and if he thought he was going to replace me as the cutie pie.....well....he only lasted a few weeks and then started getting bigger and bigger and bigger and he is still growing but is definately bigger than a donkey.

We all kinda muddle along but I have to put my paw down now and then to show who is the ''Alpha'' and ensure they are clawing the line so to growl, I am just Cosmolicous and nobody can or will forget it !!!

2010.com

Well what can I say...........................or bark !!!

It has taken me a very long time to get used to this new place but I am liking the green stuff and am loving the rain as there is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much of it (think my Mum gets fed up with it but I will never tired of it), we sometimes get Mud as well and that's really good fun to roll in but Mum doesn't like it when I do that as tends to put me in the bath straight after........now all that makes me want to do is roll is lot's of yummy stuff but apparently that is wrong as well as to Mum it smells very bad............Humans are very confusing.