Friday, September 5, 2008

Bad Mummy

Well,

What can I say, I am sooooooooo not that good at typing - I do only have paws you know...anyway.....Mum went away in August...did had good back up - Michelle and Carlie who love and adore me ( yeah, yeah, they kinda love Lou and Pip ) .........................anyways - I have loads of info coming your way - it will be in chapters and will start tomorrow.

We will also have lot's of pictures and the all important update on my ''COMPANY'' , yes ......it's coming along really well - you can now see Mum as the picture shows on our first ever photo shoot - that was a scream - made Mum lend me her necklace............I know I look adorable.........what's new..........

anyway - Will keep you posted and it's ..............................COSMOLITIOUS.COM

Friday, July 11, 2008

Photo's of Pip-Squeak


As promised photo's of the poorly Pup, her plastercaste is off in the later pic's which makes her a whole lot more dangerous, Mum is convinced that when they operated on her they also removed her teeth and replaced them with needles, I tend to agree with her :), Louis, my big bro just love's her and plays with her a lot....I tend to watch from the sidelines whilst quietly assessing the situation and I then pounce on her like a stealth fighter plan.....

Pip-Sqeak is still here


Some of you may know that Mum and Dad have ''adopted'' a female ! OMG , she is called Pip and was rescued from a car park and she was in a bad way.

Her front left paw was badly broken and it required hours of surgery, Pip may even need it amputated in years to come as it was broken for so long extra bine grew around it.....aaaghhhhh....get over the - poor little pup and think about me.

She happens to be quite cute ( don't tell Mum I said this ) on occasion so I have to make sure she is in no way some kind of competition.

So what if I do the occasional Pee pee and Mum thinks it's her, I have to remain Top Dog, Cutest Dog and Mum's Soul Mate..........Louis plays with her a lot now and I tend to watch from the side lines until Louis has made her submit, then rush in and give her a few nudges/nips until Mum comes in and the does the Dog Whispering thing of......shushing me.........

How very dare she ! , it's just a bit of fun...I mean I would NEVER fully intend to harm her now would I.com ?????

Answers will be given soon......... remember.............I AM COSMOLICIOUS X

Friday, July 4, 2008

Cosmo's Commandments

COSMO’S COMMANDMENTS/CONVICTIONS

1. Food

Owners wrongly think it’s only our jewel encrusted food bowls we are allowed to eat from – they are very wrong! To stake a claim on their food place your paw in the middle of their plate – it then becomes your food so eat it.com

2. Staircase

Use the staircase as your very own Formula 1 race track, the aim is to get down to the bottom before Mum or Dad, by fair means or foul. If you can beat them you get extra points but TRY not to trip them as humans fall faster than we can run.

3. Sleeping Myths

We sleep in our dogs beds – So last year !. First, ensure Mum and Dad buy a king size bed and NEVER let them see we can actually curl up quite small. Sleep perpendicular to them, fully stretched out, f you also stick out your tongue and tail to maximize your space they should then move to the sofa – Remember…….own their bed.com

4. The bathrooms secret exit

The bathroom does have a secret exit……..If by some miracle Mum beats me in there and manages to shut the door it is then necessary to claw, whine, try to turn the knob or get my paw under the edge to try and pull the door open. Although Mum MAY exit from the same door she entered and despite her having used the bathroom on her own for many years without canine attendance I will always ensure as should you that you have to do your utmost to get in there with her.

5. Kissing

The correct order for kissing is to go and smell/lick the other dogs bum and then kiss Mum and Dad.




It's Cosmolicious.com ......................... until next time x

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Strike a pose

Photo Shoot

6am….. All up early today as Mum has to ensure I get a ‘’tidy-up’’ which means Shampooch are coming in their bright pink van , they normally do the full works, Jacuzzi bath, massage, puppy cut and a treat which makes me look like an incredibly cute baby boy ! Today though it’s a quick trim before my foray into modeling as Mum has booked my first ‘’photo-shoot’’

10am….. Oh ohhh….Mum is in a rush as she had her yoga class which ran over, I am so much better at her with the ‘’downward dog’’ pose, her teacher keeps on having to correct her, I have tried helping but she doesn’t seem to like it when I jump on her back which I thought would be the easiest way of communicating that she should ‘’feel the posture’’, Mum just sweats and puffs but realizes practice makes perfect………..I suppose I do have a head start being a dogggggggggggggg……..

11am….. We are now in the car en route, Mum is driving like a local ( many people have commented that she drives like a local and we are still not sure if this is a compliment ) , it basically means very fast, lot’s of swerves, beeping of the horn so I just sleep through it apart from the speed bumps which for some insane reason Mum likes to drive over at approx 80kph, I do not condone this and neither does the chassis or wheel alignment of her car.

12pm….. We have arrived at the studio, I am soooooooooo ready for my close-up !
Lot’s of pretty girls have come into reception to fawn over me, am really getting to like this as well as spotting Mum packing freshly roasted chicken in case she needs to coax me…………COAX AWAY MUM X, I so know the shot they want as I have heard Mum conversing with the photographer but A. I am not stupid B. Am on some poncy hyper-allergenic diet food (more on that later but am soooo not impressed and C. I’ve gotta eat.com

1pm….. I…….AM……A……..SUPERSTAR…………………………………….

Everyone adored me, I have not signed any paw-tographs as they’ll only be sold on Ebay but I have to say it was really good fun and almost cleared Mum out of chicken. The final result is my ‘’cover-shot’’ and I am sure you will agree is completely, categorically…………………………………
COSMOLICIOUS.COM

Three is a crowd

2am….. Well it has certainly been an interesting week, Mum has been staying downstairs on the sofa as ‘Pip’ ( yes she is still here ) pee’s an awful lot, Mum say’s she may be ‘diabetic’ so cannot wait very long before wanting to drink water and pee immediately, Lou and I are not sure about ‘HER’ for many reasons, …..she is a girly, a cheeky tenacious rascal, not so good at playing but very good at chewing and is tiring Mum out, she has just done her 3rd pee-pee in 45 minutes……….Am confident she will leave us in peace soon and go back to her own home.

10am….. Uh oh………..the D.W is back, I am still not sure about her as she is now telling Mum not to carry me up to bed at night and that I have 4 working leg’s of my own………how dare she ?......D.W keeps telling Mum I am an animal, then a dog, then a Yorky and then Cosmo – I DON’T THINK SO………..I am having to re-think my tactics….I will not be overcome.
2pm….. D.W has gone , ‘Pip-squeak’ is sleeping and Mum has her yoga instructor over, Lou and I are joining in, Mum get’s a bit stressed when she is doing her downward dog pose and I jump on her back, I am only trying to help her perfect the move………Lou is now licking the yoga instructors feet, it’s all very calming and is sending me off to sleep.

4pm….. Pip is out for the count , the scallywag has been trying to jump and play with me, I admit I have wagged my tail a few times but she is very, very energetic, she has chewed into Mum’s mobile charger so Mum is having to go out to the car every few hours to charge it, I never did anything like that……well, apart from chewing a few of Mum’s favourite shoes and a few pairs of flip flops, I did always manage to wreck just the one flip flop…..Mum never did see the funny side of it though.

Will chill with Mum now until Dad get’s home, I am still COSMOLICIOUS, still not sure about ‘’Pip-Sqeak’’, we will see.com

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Pip squeak

8th June 2008

1pm….. What has Mummy gone and done ? Firstly a lady has come to the house to ‘’Train’’ ME & MUM ?, she is called Verity and is a ‘Dog Whisperer’ ???

I am apparently NOT allowed to go on the sofa whenever I want, I am NOT allowed to jump up before Mum sit’s down or after Mum sit’s down, I have to ….Wait for this….sit and stay until Mum ‘’invites’’ me to join her………..I DON’T THINK SO and am putting up a very good fight, apparently I am stubborn….Am I bothered ? This is going to be interesting.

2pm….. Now we are all going off for a ride, Mum, myself, Louis and ‘’D.W’’, Louis is in the back with her as he has a phobia about cars, we think he was used in dog fights and was transported around quite roughly, this was before Mum and Dad rescued him from K9 ( link ), so he has ‘’special needs’’, he is basically a big scaredy cat whenever he goes near or in a car so D.W is spending time reassuring him……..I just think he’s a woos.

3pm….. We are at someone’s house, I have not been here before but there is a lady holding a strange ‘Dog’, it’s wearing a funny hat and has a very odd looking front paw ( use pic )

We all go into their back garden and do lot’s of sniffing, peeing and drink some water as it’s very hot. Louis and I ignore the ‘newby’ most of the time – the ‘newby’ is called ‘Pip’ and when we go into the house she starts to chew, play, lick the lady.

Lou and I are tired so we just lay down and act as though we are very well trained so everyone is impressed at our behaviour, humans are so easy to fool aren’t they ?

4pm….. Mum, myself and Lou then leave the villa and the funny one ‘Pip’ is carried out to our car….What is going on……maybe it’s a Puppy playdate ?................We all get back home in one piece…just…Mum drives like a blonde, left-handed, Devonian – she tells everyone this so she won’t mind my telling you, we get inside and then not a lot really as ‘Pip’ can’t really do a lot with her funny paw and hat so I really can’t see this being much fun.

Cosmo signing off for now but will keep you all pawsted…………

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Super star

Mum is going to the photo studio today to choose my star cover shots.......am sure they will all be amazing and will update you later.

It's Cosmolitious !

My current schedule

4am..... Made Mum take me outside, did a bit of barking so Mum shushed me……., I gotta bark

Was ordered/asked/cajoled back inside, sat at Mum’s feet and looked up
Demurely, then stuck out my tongue ! Get’s Mum everytime and her heart just melts.

5am….. Doggy Yoga ( use pic )

Buddha pose is my favourite, the trick is to sit and then balance like a meerkat on my hind legs and then fall back onto the silk cushions on the sofa, Mum then massages me and I then go into Cosmo pose

( use pic )

6am….. Make a sticky mess with my chewy on the sofa…BTW Mum does not advocate me doing this but …..I gotta chew.com

6.30am.. Walkies !!!

When will Mum & Dad get it……yes I love my walks but I WILL NOT humiliate myself by offering them my paw – why would I do that ?
On this walk I manage to escape, chase a lady and bark a bit ( admittedly I am 10 yards away from her but I feel quite brave ) – very funny -. I then play with the water sprinklers…..Why is it if it’s bath time I can get wet but if it’s of my own accord it’s bad ? ….Answers on a postcard please as I do not know.com

7am….. Breakfast – Louis has is first, boring dried stuff as he cannot tolerate wet food ( whatever that means, I am not bothered ), then Mum mashes up my wet food with some dried food and sprinkles it all with ‘ Fairy Dust’
( contact love’em liver treats sprinkles for sponsorship )

It’s Cosmolicious.com

8am….. Nap time whilst Mum is getting ready for work, I am cuddled up with Dad and will lull him into a false sense of security, then I will run up his chest, sit on his shoulder and bite his nose 3-5 times depending on how many times Mum has told me to telepathically, it get’s Dad everytime and he then does a raspberry blow on my belly …….I love it.com

9am….. Mum has left for work, I am playing with Dad & Louis and I have Mum’s pyjama top in my favourite spot , this is my ‘’Nou Nou’’ and stops me fretting when Mum is out as we are soulmates and when I sleep after causing a bit of havoc it’s nice to smell Mum close by.

11am….. We have another walk, bit of a bark and I am now with Dad in the office trying to help him with his emails ( use pic ) don’t think Dad is that impressed as he keeps putting me on my cushion by hisfeet, very rude so I am now going downstairs to watch animal planet, it’s quite a funny programme….my fave is Meercat Manor as well as some of the ‘’dogs’’ and I use this word lightly that perform silly tricks all for the sake of a biscuit or treat……..Do they not realise if you are as cute as I am you only have to look at Mum or Dad with an….I am hungry look….and you then get some chicken….I also love cucumber/apple/strawberries/melon but apparently that is not regular dog food ?

2pm….. OMG, She is coming, I can feel her, the car is pulling up, she is out and has closed the door……………………..Hurry !!!!! Come on ….open the front door, walk in and lot’s of kissed, cuddles, belly rubs…………….
Yes…………………… I LOVE HER ! X

Cosmo signing off for now and remember, it’s………………………..

COSMOLICIOUS.COM